"Or do you not know that your body is a temple of the Holy Spirit within you, whom you have from God? You are not your own, for you were bought with a price. So glorify God in your body." 1 Corinthians 6:19-20
I know that I'm probably the least consistent blogger of all time, and I love you for staying with me. In all honesty, I always think of and miss my blog when I'm not actively working on it. However, my blog seems like a little joy that is easily stolen. Dinner must be made, laundry must be done, but my newest post? Well, that can wait. And it does so much more often than it should. I blogged almost a year ago about going through a spiritual storm. That storm ebbed and flowed for a long time. It started before I posted about it, and it continued to be a bit of a struggle afterwards. I was suffering from chronic fatigue and headaches, and those physical struggles caused me some spiritual setbacks. When I would go to my doctors, they would try their best to treat me, and they would sympathize with my symptoms, but nothing seemed to offer any relief. Eventually, I just gave up and took the medications that would treat the symptoms. They continued.
I love that modern medicine can do so much for us. However, I think sometimes we as patients limit the medical field. When I would go to the doctor, it would be when I had finally gotten so tired, and then sick from lowered immunity, that I was treated for something that was an effect of the problem. A few months ago, I found myself at my wits end. I had made life changes such as transferring to a teaching position where I would be under less stress, I had worked on my spiritual growth, and I was not "sweating the small things" (as much). It seemed to help a little, but I was still having far too many migraines, and I was absolutely exhausted all of the time. One weekend, I was so tired, I barely got off of the couch. My husband was afraid of what was wrong. Something had to change.
I decided to explore new options. After struggling over a year, I went to a woman's health specialist. My mother highly recommended a doctor not too far out of town, and honestly, I wanted to go to a doctor who had never met me. It's hard for me to convince anyone who knows what my life is like that I'm more exhausted than I should be. I work full time, I have three "lively" children, and I do extra things on the side; my life is busy. Here's the thing though, I knew I was feeling worse than I should. For an entire YEAR of my life, I allowed people around me, including family, friends, nurses, and doctors (all who I know meant well), to tell me that I felt the way anyone who lived my life should feel. I sort of wanted them to tell me nothing was wrong, because part of me knew something was wrong, and I was secretly afraid of knowing what was ailing me. It doesn't make sense that I didn't seek help sooner now, because I got to a point where I realized that I was missing out on actually living the experiences of my life, because I was just surviving them. What kind of living is that? Didn't God mean more for my life than that? I needed help. I got it.
I went to one visit with my new doctor afraid that he would see me as a wimp, because I had convinced myself that this is what my other doctors and family/friends must think about me. My biggest fear was him looking at my stats, and saying, "Mrs. Dean, you just have a lot going on, so of course you're tired." I think I would have broken down right there. Instead, he looked at my chart, and then asked me very specific questions. I held my breath when he started to take a guess at my problem, and, to my surprise, he said, "Mrs. Dean, on paper, you look perfect, but if you are feeling badly, something's wrong. Sometimes people who seem healthy are pushed aside if no disease is found, but I'm not going to give up on finding the issue." I teared up a little, because it seems I rarely make it through a doctor's visit without crying anyway (which I've mentioned before). I was so relieved that he was going to use his different tests and methods to find the issue. A nurse took four vials of blood that day and gave me an appointment for the next week as well as a list of some vitamins to begin that very day.
*Here's my request ladies: IF YOU FEEL THAT SOMETHING IS WRONG, PURSUE IT! No one knows your body like you do. I could've saved myself a lot of exhaustion if I had gone to this doctor the first time my mother recommended him to me. *
At my follow up appointment, I was even more nervous than at the first. What if all of the tests came back normal? What then? Would he think I was a hypochondriac? Would he believe that I was really feeling sick? Was I just going crazy? Would I be expected to just deal with the issues? He pulled out the results. The first result was good. I felt relief and disappointment at the same time. What he was checking were simple vitamin and hormone levels. If something had to be wrong, those were easy things to fix, right? I began to feel the tears building. It didn't take long, however, for him to reveal to me that I was severely deficient in two major vitamins and I also had some hormone deficiencies. Simple fix with natural vitamins, we hope.
I've been taking the vitamins for a month now, and while I don't feel like I'm 15 years younger, I do feel better. My mother and husband both say that there is a noticeable difference. Why didn't I do something sooner? Well, I'm the mom. I don't have time to be sick or feel badly. I have things to take care of here. Don't you say the same things yourself? Please ladies, take care of yourselves. God tells us to do so, so why do we feel that we should be the health martyrs of our families?
Here's my prayer for us:
"Dear Lord, we thank You for these bodies You have given us. We may not always feel they are perfect, but God they do so much for our families. Help us to remember that our bodies are a temple, and how we treat them directly reflects how we care for our gifts from You. We praise You for strength to push through physical ailments, but we praise You for Your healing hand. We promise here and now to strive to take care of the temple You have chosen especially for us. We love, praise, and adore You above all. Amen."
